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Chapter 1: Recent

  • This could have been a Norman Rockwell Saturday Evening Post cover image...
  • Comedy Genius!
  • How Conservatives view culture.
  • Mister Potatohead in the remake of The Great Dictator.
  • The calm before the Bourne.
  • Somebody who rides a bike is too sensible
  • Be honest
  • Trust the Government
  • Crosswalk etiquette
  • Unfortunately, there are no child negligence laws in nature.
  • Gerrard would wait a long time for his fried worm sundae.
  • Eat your heart out, Jacques Tati!
  • Jack could never understand why he always arrived at work depressed.
  • Mimi vowed to herself that once their bruises had healed
  • Jock enjoyed riding shotgun for the fire department, but
  • Ryerson's Rogers Centre after it hit the iceberg.
  • Oh, don't look at me like that, kid!
  • Robert Crumb for the digital age.
  • Abigail couldn't get that last poor call by the line judge out of her head
  • Getting to your penthouse suite may be trickier
  • Nobody knew what product the pothole patch ad was for
  • Chavon knew he would be out of luck
  • One explanation for the decline in the city's tourism.
  • Jake had long since accepted his...unusual skin condition
  • ...but it haunts their dreams to this day
  • THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON REALITY:
  • Chuck was excited by the camera in his cellphone
  • Medusa had to settle for turning all men who gazed upon her into trembling balls of jelly.
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    Welcome, Science Fiction Fans!

    If you came to Les Pages aux Folles curious about my writing thanks to science fiction or fan fiction, welcome! You can find the complete text of Alternate Reality Ain't What It Used To Be and What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children's Toys in the Archive Section, as well as three new Alternate Reality News Stories every third week in the New Section. They are clearly marked [ARNS] for easy identification. And, please feel to browse through the other writing, cartoons and miscellaneous oddments - you never know what you might enjoy!

    You may already be a winner? Well, actually...

    It is with great pleasure that I can announce that I have taken first prize in the Swift Satire Writing Competition. This was for a poem called "Love Amid the Construction. The official announcement can be found here. Details of the contest, including, at some point soon, my winning entry, can be found here. What can I say?

    WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT!

    Do Not Adjust Your Eyes

    The Weight of Information: Episode One: The Realities Leak is now available on YouTube! This pilot for a radio series is based on stories out of the two Alternate Reality News Service Books, Alternate Reality Ain't What It Used To Be and What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children's Toys (or, as one online used bookstore has it, What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children - don't ask). Click on this link to listen to Part One and this link to listen to Part Two. Interdimensional travel has never been so...multidimensional!

    You May Already Be A Winner Redux

    The Alternate Reality News Service, in conjunction with the Grasping for the Wind Web site, is running a contest! The readers who submit the best questions to either of the Alternate Reality News Service columns (which, regular readers will remember, are Ask Amritsar and Ask the Tech Answer Guy) will win free autographed copies of What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children's Toys (or, as one online discount bookseller has it listed, What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children - don't ask). Click on the link for the rules. Enter now, enter often!

    Ira Speaks!

    Sal Monaco, the Oracle of Enlightenment who now does interviews at Think Twice Radio, conducted an interview with me at Polaris 24. Don't think twice: go to Sal Monaco's Think Twice Radio Web page and give it a listen!

    The Alternate Reality News Service Grows Up

    Have you ever wanted to know what goes on behind the scenes at the Alternate Reality News Service? Of course you didn't! But, now that the question has been raised, it sounds intriguing, no? Okay, probably not. Still, here's the thing: there is now a Facebook group called The Alternate Reality News Service Cafe. If you go there, you will automatically receive a tri-weekly newsletter full of exclusive information. It is also a place where you can contribute to the Alternate Reality News Service and even, perhaps, work your way up the ARNS ladder until you are given a journalistic beat all for yourself. Doesn't that sound exciting?

    Don't answer that.

    Would you be interested in immortality?

    As you may have noticed, there is a weekly feature on Les Pages aux Folles called The Daily Me. Each article in this feature is a collection of bits and pieces of interest to a different person. I probably won't be shocking any of my readers when I say that, to date, I have made the persons up. (If you are shocked, I hear the Girls With Eyepatches site is nice this time of year...) Well, a future Daily Me could feature...you!

    Simply send me an email with your name and the names of three or four publications you regularly read and three or four issues/subjects in which you have an interest. Then, let me digest them and, two or three weeks later, The Daily Me could be The Daily You! Your name will appear in my writing...forever! No complicated creams! No messy cryogenic devices! Immortality has never been easier! What are you waiting for?