Headlines Wanted To Comment About the Concept of "Woke AI,"
But They Were Tired So Very, Very Tired...

It's A Key Part Of The Skill Set Bureaucracies Look For In Hirees

"Why are bureaucrats so slow to respond?" - Toronto Star

The Last Time A Cop Tried To Ticket The Mayor's Limo, Stern Memos Were Written

"Why the light touch with illegal parking?" - Toronto Star

Cops Need More Money

"Why so slow on traffic fixes?" - Toronto Star

Proving They're Not Nuts?

"PCs 'squirrelling' away money?" - Toronto Sun

 The Government Heard Somewhere That If You Build It, They Will Come
It's Going To Keep Building Its Until What It Heard Comes True

"Highway 407 is empty, why build Highway 413?" - Toronto Star

 Ask Governor Sarah Huckabee
Or, Better Yet, Don't

"Is minor hockey child labour?" - Toronto Star

Sure, As Long As You Can Find Good Homes For Your Dogs...Or Your Children...

"In an Age Like This, Is It Still OK To Breed?" - New York Times

If It Isn't, She Clearly Hasn't Trained Him Well Enough

"Could girlfriend's dog be racist?" - Toronto Star

A Second Coming...Of Brian Mulroney

"What will save Ontario Liberals?" - Toronto Star

How Much Heartbreak Is She Willing To Endure?

"Is staying in the city she loves an option?" - Toronto Star

I Am, George... I Am

"Who Is Afraid of Lydia Tar?" - New York Times

If Only They Had More Money, They Could Properly Investigate Themselves...

"Are cops allowed to steal without consequences?" - Toronto Star

When Media Decided Not To Judge Them

"When did judges stop acting judgey?" - Toronto Star

Considering How Many Sheilas They Have, I Would Think So

"Is Australia Big Enough To Have Two Wendy's?" - New York Times

Don't Elect Him President

"How should I handle friend who freeloads?" - Toronto Star

Are You Kidding? Any Liberal Attempt To BREATH Will Boost Trump's Campaign!

"Will charges boost Trump's campaign?" - Toronto Star

No - Our Cops Definitely Need More Money

"Is your city prepared for a zombie invasion?" - Toronto Star

Ask Tucker Carlson's Accountant

"Why promote what you don't believe in?" - Toronto Star

Because We're Sweet And Run All Over The Place

"Why do leaders treat us like saps?" - Toronto Star

 Asked And Answered
I Love When Headlines Do My Job For Me!

"A lot of us feel scared. How can we not? - Toronto Star

 "What can we do in the face of fear?
Hug our children" - Toronto Star

 My (Admittedly Imaginary) Children Are Offended By This Headline - Can I Get Your Newspaper Banned?
Somewhere?
Anywhere?

"FOR THE BREAST?" - Toronto Sun

Absolutely - Right Up To The First Time They Use Them

"Will candidates renounce new mayoral powers?" - Toronto Star

Who Dares To Say They Don't?

"Who says spy agencies always get it right?" - Toronto Star

We Really Can Live Without Cod Liver Oil

"Have we learned nothing from the cod fish collapse?" - Toronto Star

 The Cops Are Starving For Funds
They Absolutely Need More Money, Already!

"After so many bungles, why's he on top?" - Toronto Star

Sit Around Drinking Beer And Belching While Watching Knitting Shows?

"What Could These Women Have Done if They'd Had Wives?" - New York Times

 For Whom the Bell Rings Was Not What Hemingway's Work Was Called
Graham Greene Did Not Write The Power Company and the Glory
The Handmaid's Maiseh? Not A Margaret Atwood Novel
That's Pretty Much It

"What do I need to know about title fraud?" - Toronto Star

Shareholders Answer: Hike Prices Because We Love Dividends

"Firm asks: 'What is the loving thing to do?'" - Toronto Star

 Yes
Fortunately, Kardashian Is Likely To Refuse Because She Doesn't Want To Do Anything To Jeopardize Her Bid To Enter NATO

"Is Moscow seeking weapons from Kim?" - Toronto Star

If You Have To Ask...

"How much will Gardiner really cost?" - Toronto Star

Wait Until Humility Comes Back Into Fashion

"I'm a guy who hates all my clothes. How can I make my wardrobe more stylish?" - Toronto Star

It Is If The Grammatical Correctness Of Your Headline Is Any Indication

"Is Apple thinking too differently?" - Toronto Star

It Might Be Less Expensive To Have Yourself Cryogenically Frozen Until Housing Costs Come Down

"Should I buy or rent right now?" - Toronto Star

 ChatGPT Says: "Don't Be Silly. There's Nothing To See Here."
BingChat Says "Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid."
So, It's Anybody's Guess, Really...

"Should we be afraid of AI?" - Toronto Star