The Daily Me – Jerry Lamartain and the Furrious Five

Thank you, Jerry Lamartain and the Furrious Five, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. And, then, we thought, Musical episodes are really gimmicky, and they don't really work for all genres. Can you imagine a musical episode of Hannibal? Actually, we can, but you aren't as warped as we are. Hopefully. But no, we know we shouldn't give in to the temptation to do a musical issue – readers would see right through this opportunistic grab at creative relevance. We shouldn't give in to the temptation...and yet...so tempting...so...

Enjoy,
The Daily Me Staff

Aldean, All The Time

I Got Those Deep Down, Country Singer Blues, Mama

Mah dog left me
Mah girl got hit by a car
I done run out o' money
My teeth ain't in their jar

If t'weren't fer bad luck
I'd have no luck at all, and that's a fact
Lookin' at mah dead truck
I thank The Good Lord at least I ain't Black

I'm white, as white as they come
I may not be smart, but at least I ain't dumb
When I don't know the lyrics, I just mmm mmm
I'm white, as white as they come

You know, some folks complain that country and western music has a thinly veiled streak o' racism in it. You know what I say to that? If Black Lives Matter didn't want to be in mah music video, maybe they should have conducted their protests at home. What? What's that you say? You say what we now know as country music drew on the instruments, cultural traditions and techniques o' Black music and musicians? You know what I say to that? Get yer head out of the Deep State's butt and think for yourself, sheeple!

They cancelled my favourite country singer
An illegal's done taken my job
They say for Charlie Manson, I'm a dead ringer
My sister done married a rich city snob

Mah house burned down in a forest fire
I just want my old life back
As problems in mah life pile higher 'n higher
I thank Heaven at least I ain't Black

I'm white, as white as they come
I may not be smart, but at least I ain't dumb
When I don't know the lyrics, I just mmm mmm
I'm white, as white as they come
And I'm proud

SOURCE: Entertainment For Dummies

[http://www.politicsfordummies.com/entertainmentfordummies/home.asp?did=678&dir=bb]
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The Politics And Drama Are Positively Operatic!

Anna and the King of Eastern Europe

When it comes to singing opera, who can hit the high cs?
Anna
When it comes to political smarts, who gets failing ds?
Anna

On stage, for her character audiences are always rootin'
Anna
Off stage, she refuses to denounce the war of Vladimir Putin
Anna

Anna, Anna, Anna Netrebko
Oh, girl, you go, girl, you go
When it comes to war criminals, why can't you say no, girl?
Anna, Anna, Anna Netrebko

She's losing opportunities because she made a bad bet
Anna
So, naturally she's suing the Met
Anna

Why she supports a genocidal madman is a mystery
Anna
But she'll find she's on the wrong side of history
Anna

Anna, Anna, Anna Netrebko
Oh, girl, you go, girl, you go
The Ukrainians being slaughtered are not just another show, girl
Anna, Anna, Anna Netrebko

SOURCE: Entertainment Right Now

[http://www.entertainmentrightnow.com/mini/smug2023/2023/07/07/annabananafeefiefofanna002/]
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You Heard It As "Pads" McKneely?
Sorry, But That's A Completely Different Song!

The Ballad of Nads McKneely

This here's a story about a likely lad
Who earned hisself the nickname "Nads"

Nads

He rode into town on a wild, buckin' scooter
He developed a rep as a popgun shooter

Nads
This is the ballad of Nads
For Seaess he would suffer any embarrassment
While abetting progressive activist harassment

Nads
Big Mad Nads (Mad Nads)

This is the ballad of Nads McKneely
A hero a bit too touchy, not enough feely
That's Nads (Mad Nads)

Our hero never learned his lesson
Supportin' Seaess' gleeful reinforcement of oppression

Nads
Really, Nads?

His pursuit of her goals knew no limitation
He cheerfully used his bulk for physical intimidation
Nads
Big Bad Nads (Bad Nads)

This is the ballad of Nads McKneely
Who spread his ignorance a little too freely
That's Nads (Bad Nads)

Now, you wouldn't need to do a deep internet probe
To see him cozy up to racists and homophobes

Nads
That's right, Nads

You could say he was Seaess' patsy
What's a nice Jewish boy like you doing pallin' around with Nazis?
Oh, Nads
Dangerous To Know Nads (No Nads)
This was the ballad of Nads McKneely
Who should choose his friends more carefully, really
That's Nads (No Nads)
Big Bad Nads (No Nads)

SOURCE: Poetry, Cornered

[http://www.cibc.com/ca/personal/poetrycorner/878.html]
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How Nixonian!

He's Got a (Not So) Little List

As some day it may happen that power I have again
I've got a list little, I've got a little list
Of all the people who have caused me a great deal of pain
People I wouldn't miss, I never would miss

There's the Manhattan DA who charged me with a sex offence
The Vice President who turned out was more than a little dense
The porn star who blabbed to the whole world about my advances
The Florida Governor who around my base does stupid dances
And worst of all, the left-wing, commie so-called journalist
They'd none of 'em be missed, by me they'd not be missed

He's got them on the list
He's got them on the list
And none of them he'd miss
Not a single one he'd miss

The antifa protester in a mask with a raised fist
You bet he's on my list, he sure is on my list
The Special Prosecutor who is all over my ass
The Georgia Secretary of State who put my campaign last
The alliance causing problems for my good friend Vladimir
The usurper President who thinks he has nothing to fear
The states that refuse to create a total abortion ban
And anybody who opposes suspending the Constitution
And let us not forget the evil Jewish philanthropist
He certainly wouldn't be missed! By nobody would he be missed!

He's got them on the list
He's got them on the list
And none of them he'd miss
Not a single one he'd miss

SOURCE: The Postington Wash

[http://www.postingtonwash.com/wp-dyn/articles/A49881-2023Aug09.html]
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