How Many Ways Can You Make Fun of TwitterX In a Headline?
Oh, I'm Just Getting Started...

George W. Bush Slaps His Forehead And Thinks, If I Had Only Classified SAND As A Weapon Of Mass Destruction, The Invasion Of Iraq Would Have Been Legal!

Trump: "This historic executive order that I will sign today will formally classify fentanyl as a weapon of mass destruction, which is what it is. No bomb does what this thing is doing."

You Forgot "And Happier Than Me - The Bastards!"

Vice President JD Vance: "People who don't have children are "sociopathic," "psychotic," and "deranged".

Good Thing You're The Good Guys, Then, Or This Would Sound Like Stalking And Criminal Harassment

JUST IN:

Stop Antisemitism founder says that "antisemites" will be hunted down:

"We will follow you for the rest of your life. When you look for a job, when you look for a spouse, when you look for anything our work will always be documented."

Okay, You've Covered Me And Myself, But What Does I Think?

Q: A number of Republicans have denounced your statement on Rob Reiner. Do you stand by it?

Trump: He was a deranged person as far as Trump is concerned...I thought he was very bad for our country

What Did They Do? Quote The President Complimenting A Democrat?

Trump: I'm suing the BBC for putting words in my mouth literally. They put words in my mouth. They had me saying things that I never said. I guess they used AI or something. They have me speaking with words that I never said.

Umm, Would That Be The Same Alan Dershowitz Who Claimed That Sex With Cottage Cheese Was A Cure For Cancer? Not Sure How Credible He Is...

At the White House Hanukkah party, billionaire Miriam Adelson publicly urged Trump to consider a presidential run in 2028, saying Alan Dershowitz told her it would be legal.

Some in the crowd began chanting, "4 more years!"

Oil? Is That Some Kind Of Code Word For Fentanyl?

Trump on Venezuela: "Getting land, oil rights, whatever we had - they took it away because we had a president that maybe wasn't watching. But they're not gonna do that. We want it back. They took our oil rights. We had a lot of oil there. They threw our companies out. And we want it back."

Sen. John Fetterman laments that Democrats are running for office by being "anti-Israel."

"That's a betrayal of our party's values!" he says.

He adds that TikTok and social media have "poisoned an entire generation" with "strong anti-Israel views."

Only 100 Per Cent? Karoline, If You're Going To Lie, Go Big! The President Would Have Said 1,000 Maybe 7,000 Per Cent! You Could Learn A Thing Or Two From Him

Leavitt: Under Joe Biden, 100 percent of the jobs gained were for foreign born workers. These were for people who flooded our country and took the jobs of hard-working Americans

Vance: "Why have rents gone down for 4 consecutive months? Because we've started to get those illegal aliens out of the USA. Those criminals, those gang members, those people that are taking homes that ought by right to go to the people in this room. It's simple economics."

"You Can See It Sooner If You Just Buy This Outrageously Overpriced Pillow Set!"

EXCLUSIVE: Mike Lindell Says The Election Fraud Evidence Is Set To Be Released In Early January & Will End The Democratic Party As We Know It!

Q: "The jobs report you mentioned this morning...said 100,000 jobs were lost in October and the unemployment rate...is the highest since the pandemic...How do you inspire companies to hire people?

Vance: "The unemployment rate only counts people who are looking for work."

"You Think We're Gonna Make It Easy For The War Crimes Prosecutors? You People! It's Enough To Drive A Man To Drink!"

Hegseth on the second Sept 2 strike: "Of course we're not going to release a top secret full unedited of that to the general public."

But He's A Doctor, So At Least He Can Prescribe Himself Something For The Illness

So why is OZ using CHILDREN to measure costs? SICK!

So, Antifa Is Actually...MAGA?

AG Pam Bondi: "That's one of the things about Antifa... they are very organized. You're seeing people with thousands of signs that all match... someone is funding it.."

"Compared To How Israel Has Treated Democratic Leaders, It's Practically A Hot Date And A Romp Between The Sheets!"

Q: By any metric, the Israelis are flouting the ceasefire Trump negotiated by killing an average of 2 children a day not allowing aid into Gaza. How long can the Israeli's be allowed to show such disrespect to President Trump?

RUBIO: That's your characterization about ‘disrespect'

The Army Spiritual Fitness Guide Is 100 Pages Long? I Can Write All The Army Needs To Know About Spirituality In One Sentence: "Thou Shalt Not Kill."

Hegseth lambasts a chaplain core that's been degraded by "political correctness and secular humanism."

The 100 page Army spiritual fitness guide makes a single reference to "God."

"In short it's unacceptable and unserious," he says. "We're tossing it."