Thank you, Rollin Stone, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. And, then, we're devoted pacifists, but our faith in non-violence was shaken by reporting that the Pentagon spent more than $7.4 million on lobster tails in a four month period. Mmm...lobster tails! We like lobster tails! We resolved to not let this affect our ethical stance against violence, but that resolve was almost immediately shaken by the news that the government paid $15.1 million for ribeye steaks in a single month. Meat! Meeeeeeeaaaaat! So much, so much, so very much meat. Of course, we aren't going to abandon our beliefs for a single steak, but $15.1 worth? Stay strong! Our principles cannot be bought for a stadium-full of meat and seafood! We have to stay strong! But...but...then, we found out the Pentagon had paid $124,000 for ice cream machines, and $139,224 on 272 orders of doughnuts! And we figured There's being principled, and there's being a fanatic about it.
Where do we sign up?
Enjoy,He Doesn't Have To State That He Would Take Amazingness, Fantasticalness Or Incrediblosity - They're Always There In The Subtext
A reporter asked President Donald Trump: "A new report says a military investigation has found it was the United States that struck the school in Iran. Do you take responsibility?"
Trump's response? "Responsibility? I...I don't think I know that word. Can't be a very important word if I've never heard of it - I'm great with words. The best, they say. Oh! Oh, wait! Does 'responsibility' mean 'awesomeness?' Because that would be okay. I would totally take awesomeness!"
*SIGH* It's going to be a long war.
SOURCE: Cleveland Wheeler Dealer
[http://www.cleveland.ca/enter/index.ssf?/news/wheelerdealer/index.ssf%3fu/base/news/1236749850263321.xml]
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SOURCE: No Comment Quotes
[http://thesepeopleareinsane.psy/update.toshtml]
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Some of what Bart was writing on the chalkboard in the opening credit sequence of this week's episode of The Simpsons:
Nineteen Eighty Four was a warning, not an instruction manual.SOURCE: Ukrainian TV Guide
[http://www.tvguide.ua/listings/index.asp?referrerID=0&returnurl=%2Flistings%2Findex%2Easp%3F®Mode=0]
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An Ice Cream Machine For Every Newsroom On The Planet...
1 for the books...especially the horror genre) The American/Israeli war on Iran is costing the two countries an average of around two billion dollars a day. What could that money be paying for instead?SOURCE: Les Pages aux Folles
[http://www.lespagesauxfolles.ca]
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Right People, Wrong Timeline
Sycophantic psychopathy. Try saying that five times fast. Or, to maintain your sanity, don't.
Whether saying it's not the President's job have a war plan ("You know the saying 'you break it you buy it?' I don't buy that one bit.") or whatever this is, "To Donald J. Trump, you just surpassed Ronald Reagan as the most consequential Republican president since Lincoln… You're a Reagan plus, plus, plus," Senator Lindsey Graham has said so many outlandish pro-Trump things lately that it wouldn't be much of an exaggeration to say that he's giving the President a full body ass kissing. Sorry for putting that image in your head. Maybe if you repeat sycophantic psychopathy five times fast, it will drive the image out.
Israel and the US are "killing all the right people?" In what universe are 150 schoolgirls the right people to kill? Now, if we were talking about the wealthiest and most connected people who were let into the most exclusive clubs, and who wouldn't let your children into their schools - you know, the people who the phrase "the right people" used to refer to - Graham's assessment of who deserves to be killed might be worth taking seriously
.But it never seems to work that way, does it?
SOURCE: Karl's Big Red Web Page of Unreconstructed Marxism
[http://www.bigred.commie/articles/218^.htm]
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Battleship: Iran War Edition
Despite an Iranian blockade of the Strait of Hormuz, President Donald Trump exhorted allies to send their ships through it. "Come on! Iran is finished!!" he wrote in Truth Antisocial. "We kicked their asses bigly!!! Your ships will be perfectly safe!!!! What do you have to lose?!?!? Thank you for your inattention to this matter. DJT"
As Thailand discovered, what it had to lose by trying to send an oil tanker through the Strait of Hormuz was the oil tanker.
In order to maintain control over the waterway, Iran attacks all vessels it hasn't approved of with a combination of missiles, drones and/or explosive "suicide skiffs" disguised as fishing boats. If only the United States had some experience sinking fishing boats, it might make passage through the Strait safer. If only the United States had some experience sinking fishing boats...
SOURCE: The New York Crimes
[https://www.nycrimes.com/live/2026/03/15/middleeast/israel-iran-war-fishing]
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