LEST IT BE THAT THE BAG OF CRAZY IS LOOKING INTO YOU
Thank you, Duff Stribley, for signing up for The Daily Me. Our search engine has combed the Internet for up to the minute news items that fit the profile you have so painstakingly filled out for us. Then, we weighted the probability that you would be interested in these articles against forms which showed what people with tastes similar to yours have liked reading in the past. Then, Alejandro Manjavacas and F. Javier García de Abajo of the Institute of Optics at the Spanish National Research Council in Madrid showed that friction exists even in a vacuum. Bastards.
Enjoy,At Least Pandora's Ills Weren't All In Her Head
LEST IT BE THAT THE BAG OF CRAZY IS LOOKING INTO YOU
SOURCE: Karl's Big Red Web Page of Unreconstructed Marxism
[http://www.bigred.commie/articles/118^.htm]
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Sadly, He Still Makes More Sense Than The International Cooperation Minister
Oh. My. God. Ohmygod! Ohmygod! Ohmygod! Justin Bieber had the most awesome interview in Rolling Stone magazine! How awesome was it? I'm tempted to read the paper version of Rolling Stone instead of skimming it online. Oh, yeah! The interview was that awesome.
Check it out! The Bieb said: "Abortion bad." How profound is that? I mean, we knew Justin was the greatest singer in the history of singing, but who knew he was so deep?
And, he's not just a one issue guy, either! Oh, no! He's really into politics, too. In the Rolling Stone interview, he also said: "Korea bad."
Sigh!
SOURCE: Teen Persons
[http://www.teenpersonsmag.com/starstuff/watchthiscareer/bieberfeiber.shtml]
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I Prefer Zippers
12 buttons Facebook should have instead of "like"
1. scoff* [INSERT EXCEPTION HERE]
SOURCE: The Web Page of Lists
[http://www.ListsPage.argh/2011/February/Facebook_the_Muzak.asp]
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Waste Not, Want Plenty
When he arrived at his office, Toronto Mayor Rob Ford was surprised to find himself knee deep in solid waste. Apparently, MicroMacroMiniMax Solutions, the private company that had been given the contract to pick up the city's garbage, had neglected to tell anybody what they were going to do with it once they had it.
"This is private enterprise working like it should," Ford, with the dyspeptic mongoose expression that reporters have come to identify on him as a smile, stated. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need a shower."
SOURCE: aye Weakly
[http://www.aye.net/]
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Chinese Hackers - Man, I Used To Love Playing That Game When I Was A Kid!
Chinese hackers have broken into Canadian government computers, giving them access to sensitive policy documents. Canadians are up in arms about the computer intrusions because, of course, they hate the idea that the Chinese know more about what our government is doing than we do.
SOURCE: This 22 Minutes Feels Like An Hour
[http://www.mothercorp.ca/hour22minutes/]
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Everything I Need To Know In Life I Learned From Fringe
Kristine Casey recently gave birth to a healthy baby boy. What makes this newsworthy? Not the fact that Casey is 61 years old, although that does make it kind of icky. No, what makes this newsworthy is the fact that she was carrying a surrogate for her daughter, Sara Connell, and her husband, Bill. Thus, Casey bore her own grandchild.
But, the woman being responsible for the birth of her own grandson didn't involve time travel. Too bad - it isn't cool if it doesn't involve time travel.
SOURCE: Scientific Canadian
[http://www.scican.com/article.cfm?chanID=sc003&articleID=1124H3FB-2D145-20K5-AYE1582614B788288]
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Of Course, I Thought Alien Was A Comedy
Filmmaker Peter Greenaway has announced that he is set to write and direct his first romantic comedy. The film is called 4 Storms and 2 Babies, and is scheduled to shoot in Amsterdam later this year.
Greenaway's first romantic comedy? I would have thought that was The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover!
SOURCE: Imaginary Movie Database
[http://www.imd.com/title/tt0255357/]
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And, We All Know How Well HIS Career Turned Out
SOURCE: No Comment Quotes
[http://thesepeopleareinsane.psy/update.toshtml]
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The Whole Thing Is Odais
International Cooperation Minister Bev Oda is [not] dedicated to the rule of law and transparency in government. Her decision to suspend funding for Kairos, a church-backed aid group, was [not] well reasoned and supported by the facts. The fact that she doctored a document and then lied to Parliament about what she had done was clearly [not] not political.
The Prime Minister should [not] stand behind her 100 per cent. He should definitely [not] not listen to calls for an investigation into her behaviour or, worse, for her resignation.
SOURCE: Canadian Depress
[http://www.cd.org/english/notforyou.htm]
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What Is The Sound Of One Hand…Naah, Let's Not Go There!
Google has announced that it won't automatically finish search terms that appear to be looking for pornography. Yeah. That's right. The porn industry is objecting to this, of course, because it's much harder to type search terms into Google with one hand.
SOURCE: Late Tonight with David Lenoman
[http://marketing.ubs.com/latetonight/latetonightshow/monologue]
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Nyah, Nyah! My Genocide's Bigger Than Your Genocide!
Protests are intensifying against a plan to have a specific zone in the Canadian Museum for Human Rights devoted to the Holocaust while as many as 50 other mass atrocities would have to share a single room nearby.
These protests could be avoided if the Canadian Museum for Human Rights adopted the Holocaust Unit (HU) as the standard by which people can understand the relative suffering of different ethnic groups. The HU is calculated using a complex formula that includes terms for: the absolute number of people who died; the number of people who died as a percentage of the number of people belonging to the group who had been alive before the genocide began; the number of people of other ethnicities killed as a result of the genocide, and; a fixed term currently referred to as "Hitler's Constant."
The German genocide of Jews is set at 1.0 HU. The Rwandan Genocide, by way of contrast, is .93 HU and Bosnia is .89 HU, while the colonists' genocidal war against native North Americans is 1.23 HU.
If the Canadian Museum for Human Rights adopted the HU and allocated space accordingly, it could avoid further conflict. Of the publicly embarrassing kind.
SOURCE: Ottawa Stunned
[http://www.canoodle.com/NewsStand/OttawaStunned/News/2011/02/12/526324.html]
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