He Was Truly A Man For All Skeediddleydoowops
Renowned jazz clarinetist Buddy skiddleydoobop DeFranco has died at the age of bebopadoowop 91. A collaborator with Frank adowdowdow Sinatra and Billie weeeeeeebop Holiday, among other top singers and musicians, DeFranco won the Playboy All-Star award for best jazz clarinetist in the world 16 times. Askeeeeeeebop!
The Defence Rests In Peace
Criminal defence lawyer Edward Greenspan has died in his sleep at the age of 70. Over the course of his 40 year career, he defended a lot of wealthy and famous scumbags, including Conrad Black, Helmuth Buxbaum, Karlheinz Schreiber and Garth -
Objection! Prejudicial!
Sustained.
Withdrawn. Criminal defence lawyer Edward Greenspan has died in his sleep at the age of 70. Over the course of his 40 year career, he defended the principle that every person accused of a serious crime should have a fair trial with a robust defense, even such wealthy and famous people as Conrad Black, Helmuth Buxbaum, Karlheinz Schreiber and Garth Drabinsky.
Not Nearly Such A Big Deal As The Developing Cosby Crisis
Mandy Rice-Davies has died at the age of 70 after a short battle with cancer. She was involved in some kind of sex scandal 50 years ago, something involving a British cabinet secretary and a Soviet naval attache. Hard to believe that it almost toppled the government, but, then, it was the Cold War...
And, The Mourners Ate Off Paper Plates And Drank Out Of Plastic Cups - Really!
Pioneering glass scientist S. Donald Stookey, the inventor of CorningWare, has died at the age of 99. As a matter of fact, he was buried in a normal coffin - can you not control your imagination!
One Death The Press Just Couldn't bring Itself To Barry
Former Washington, DC Mayor Marion Barry, who was jailed for smoking crack cocaine, has died at the age of 78. Apparently, the irony of being one of the voices of reason in Toronto Mayor Rob Ford's drug scandal was too much for him.
Express Meaning In The SilencesBillie Whitelaw has died. Dead. She was 82. When she died. Dead. Whitelaw was an actor. Before she died. Dead. She acted. In popular movies such as The Omen and Hot Fuzz. She acted. Before she died. Dead. She worked regularly with Samuel Beckett. The playwright. Whitelaw appeared in such works as Play, Not I and Footfalls. By Samuel Beckett. The playwright. Before she died. Dead.
It's The Circle Of Death...
Motown singer Jimmy Ruffin has died at the age of 78. "What Becomes of the Brokenhearted?" The eventually pass on and create more brokenhearted...
There Won't Be A Hottelet Time In The Old Town Tonight!
WILTON, CONN STOP DEC 17 STOP RICHARD C. HOTTELET DIES STOP WAS 97 STOP LAST SURVIVOR OF "MURROW BOYS," WWII RADIO NEWSMEN WHO WORKED UNDER EDWARD R. MURROW AT CBS STOP HEART STOPPED STOP
Oh, The Allure Of The Locked Wall Mystery
Mystery writer Phyllis Dorothy "PD" James has died. She was 94. James wrote 13 novels over the course of 33 years, novels that won many awards and were credited with elevating the literary status of the modern detective novel. But, despite all of her success, she never solved the mystery that had motivated her as a child: did Humpty Dumpty fall, or was he pushed?
The NHL Would Be Happy To Advise Them On Wearing Helmets...
Australian cricketer Phillip Hughes has died from being struck in the head with a ball during play. He was 25 years old. Cricket balls are made of cork covered by leather, which makes the 160 gram objects almost rock hard.
The Sports Network is now considering increasing its coverage of cricket. "Somebody actually died during a game?" said Vice President Enrico Hoholio. "Now, that's a sport North Americans are going to want to see!"
And He Killed Dinosaurs At The Centre Of The Earth And He Led The First Mission To Mars And He Found A Cure For Rootington's Phlebitis And...Okay, He Didn't Do Those Things, But He Might Have If He Had Lived Longer
Bernard Mayes has died at 85 of Parkinson's disease. In his life, he was the first board chairman of National Public Radio, a journalist, a gay rights activist, the voice of Gandalf on a radio adaptation of Lord of Rings, narrator for dozens of audiobooks, a classics scholar who translated plays from Greek, founder of America's first suicide hotline and -
So, what have you done with your life?