Les Pages Aux Folles: Headlines Are Their Own Worst Emeny
Headlines Are Their Own Worst Emeny
Price Was Getting Restless, Decided Not To Wait For Supply And Demand To Show Up For Their Threesome Before Entering The Market Bar
"Gas prices likely to rise from near-18-month lows"
- Toronto Star
"NEB pegs oil oversupply at 202,000 barrels a day"
- Globe and Mail
"We're Sorry The Blood From Our Noses Got On Your Boots" Offensive To Whites
"The Trump 'Resistance': Right-wing racists bad, left-wing racists not so much"
- Toronto Sun
It's Not Like...Dying...
"Funny isn't always easy"
- Toronto Star
As WOPR Truly Told Matthew Broderick...
"Is marriage bad for women's overall happiness and health?"
- Globe and Mail
"Divorce is financially devastating - but it can also ruin your mental health"
- Globe and Mail
It Hurts Their Delicate, Hate-filled Feelings
"Trudeau needs to cool it with the mantra 'Conservatives = racists'"
- Toronto Sun
He Won't Actually Do Anything About Your Concerns, But He Hopes You Will Find The Empty Exercise Comforting
"New education minister on political hot seat
Lecce says he's willing to listen to concerns about class sizes and other controversial changes"
- Toronto Star
And, You Thought Steroids Were Bad!
"Blue Jays
And the young will only get younger"
- Toronto Star
Country Is Behind US In Breaching The Deal, But It's Hoping To Catch Up Quickly
"Tensions build in Gulf as Iran vows new breach of nuclear deal"
- Globe and Mail
You Mean, A Government That Lifts As Well As Separates?
"Our personal support workers need better support"
- Toronto Star
So, You KNOOOOWWW There Will Justice...
"Premier examining French's appointments"
- Toronto Star
Quick! Somebody Sextuple The Population So We Make A Decent Market!
"We must do a better job attracting corporate head office"
- Globe and Mail
Guess We Won't Be Hearing From Him Again, Then
"Sidewalk Labs CEO says 'trust' is crucial"
- Toronto Star
That's What They Get For Outsourcing Fun To China
"They don't make fun like they used to"
- Toronto Star
Fortunately, Participants Didn't Feel The Need To Start Shouting With Hand Grenades
"Shots heard in York Landing, Man., were communication tactic: RCMP"
- Globe and Mail
Scheer Would Like To Get Promise In Writing
When Asked Why, He Responded "Oh, No Reason..."
"Ford vows to stay out of federal campaign"
- Toronto Star
They Gotta Do Something With That Oversupply!
"Spill raises new questions about offshore oil industry"
- Globe and Mail
Because The Worst Corporate Behaviour Is Usually Exhibited By Companies With .00000037 Market Share
"Amazon is a giant, but bigness isn't a crime
The company's scale worries critics, but antitrust law punishes conduct, not size"
- Toronto Star
We're Doomed
"The winter of our discontent
Populism is likely to continue to swell until citizens see pragmatic solutions and better outcomes for their families"
- Globe and Mail
They're Doomed
"Canada must help the Saudi Sisters"
- Globe and Mail
We're All Doomed
"Your voice matters in reducing nuclear weapons"
- Toronto Star
We're All...Something Bad That Begins With The Letter D...
"Cannabis use tied to memory loss"
- Toronto Sun
Will The Baby Have A Chance To Vote Before Hitting The Sidewalk With The Bathwater?
"Johnson draws hard line with reshuffle
Conciliation on Brexit out the window, fuelling talk of a general election"
- Toronto Star
Claim Not To Be Starved For Entertainment, But...
"Swedes look for man in clown mask"
- Toronto Sun
And The Most Gregarious Since 1957
And The Most Petulant Since 1924
And...
"2019 the 'newsiest' year since a tumultuous 1968"
- Toronto Star
Clearly, They're Not Rethinking Them All That Hard...
"Car owners are now rethinking recall"
- Toronto Star
"Toyota recalls 70,000 vehicles"
- Toronto Sun
"FCA recalls 965,000 vehicles over emissions rules"
- Globe and Mail
"Honda recalls 1.2M more vehicles over airbags"
- Globe and Mail
"Ford recalls nearly 1.4 million cars over steering wheels that could fall off"
- Globe and Mail
They Zen Koan, Not Zen Koant!
"A Tourist Town Without Tourists"
- New York Times
It Would Pretty Much Ruin Our Business Plan, For One Thing
"A dangerous path
Be wary of Grits 'fake news' policing plan for election"
- Toronto Sun
Although They're In A Position To Buy Higher Quality, Artisanal Memories
"Childhood memories aren't just for the rich"
- Toronto Star
After His Nuclear War With Iran, International Trade Will Be The Least Of People's Problems
"Trump's misunderstood trade policy"
- Toronto Sun
And, Despite What The President Stated, No Rats Were Involved In The Research
"Baltimore doctors using 3D-printed organs"
- Toronto Star
It's Still Icky No Matter When The Subject Comes Up
"The Placenta, an Afterthought No Longer"
- New York Times
Driving Into Rocks Not AAA Recommended
"Rocky start for driverless cars"
- Toronto Star
