You Should Make Hay While the Headlines Shine

Really? How Can You Be Sure They Told Your Poll The Truth?

"Trump's lies are music to audience's ears
President's falsehoods part of the package and maybe part of the appeal" - Toronto Star

 "Voters See Selves in Trump" - New York Times

Unfortunately, We're More Likely To Won't It

"This could be an age of progress, if we will it" - Globe and Mail

If Only They Didn't Have To Choose One Before The Next Election!

"Poll puts leaderless Liberals ahead of Ford's Tories" - Toronto Star

Murphy Flunked Out Of Law School

"Law to speed up justice system creates chaos due to lack of clarity" - Globe and Mail

Smug, Self-obsessed And Petulant - What's Not To Love?

"Standing up for Canada's national temperament" - Toronto Star

 Some People's Priorities! Am I Right?
Human Rights? Puh-leaze!

"Trump signs China deal, easing trade war escalation
Pact intended to open Chinese market to more U.S. companies" - Toronto Star

 "Human-rights groups issue new warning about Beijing 'threat' amid signing of U.S.-China trade deal" - Globe and Mail

Economists Decry Opinions As "Unscientific, Even If They Are Right"

"87% think food prices rising faster than income" - Toronto Star

"They're Stealing Our Tactics!"

"Union leaders holding parents 'hostage' in education contract talks, Ford says" - Globe and Mail

She Makes Mud Pies With Real Mud!

"Paris Hilton is one of the worst chefs in history" - Toronto Star

Economists - They're Such Kidders!

"Governments ought to get serious about bringing down debt" - Globe and Mail

 "Better the government pay than the consumer in the next downturn" - Globe and Mail

I Weep For For The State Of Canadian Newspaper Editing

"Canada should release Meng in exchange two Michaels" - Toronto Star

You're A Year Older

"IF TODAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY" - Globe and Mail

No Pressure, But...HE'D BETTER HURRY!

"Quebec leader says he can rejuvenate Greens
Tyrrell promises radical 'eco-socialist' platform" - Toronto Star

 "Ocean was its hottest in 2019, study finds" - Toronto Star

On The Other Hand, Economists Have No Problem Delivering Bad News...

"Citigroup's female staff earn 27 per cent less than male counterparts" - Globe and Mail

 "DECLINE IN MANUFACTURING HAS HURT EMPLOYMENT, ESPECIALLY FOR MEN, STATISTICS CANADA SAYS" - Globe and Mail

 It's Easy To Blow Things Up
Now, Making Them Fly...

"SpaceX launches, destroys rocket
Demonstration of safety system deemed a success" - Toronto Star

That Would Be The Conservative Minister Of Buzzkill

"Duke and Duchess should foot their own security bill if they become private citizens: former minister" - Globe and Mail

Not The Love Bug? Disappointing...

"Clones help the legacy of Herbie, a renowned elm tree, live on" - Globe and Mail

 Red Wine Wants To Ensure No Blood Flows
Lager Takes A Harder Line

"Canada keeps up pressure on Tehran
Champagne stresses need for flight recorders while counterpart backtracks" - Toronto Star

They Know Reverse Psychology, So They Can't Be Tricked That Way

"The challenge of luring psychiatrists to small towns from big cities" - Globe and Mail

When It Comes To Politics, We're All Bozos On This Airbus

"Iran's top leader takes aim at U.S. 'clowns'" - Toronto Star

Wear A Bulletproof Resume

"How to prepare for those killer interview questions" - Globe and Mail

I Can't Seem To Shake This Hacking Cough

"Spotify hacks revealing strange taste in music
Some listeners are fighting back against hackers as others learn to live with the unwanted noise" - Toronto Star

 "Three ways to hack instant ramen
Ditch the flavour packets and upgrade those dehydrated noodles with these easy homemade soup bases" - Toronto Star

 "'Brain hack' aims to change health behaviours
Ottawa Hospital Research Institute to test mental tool designed to help people fulfill their diet and fitness goals" - Globe and Mail

 "Russians are working harder to cover their hacks" - Toronto Star

 "Travellers warned of hacking threat from charging stations" - Toronto Star

 "Thousands of Disney Plus users say they were hacked
Customers report being locked out of account just hours after service launched" - Toronto Star

Are You Kidding? Most Left-wing Scandals Happen Because The Democrats Are Getting Too Much Of It From The Wrong People!

"Most Democrats Don't Get It" - New York Times

 Table Is Opposed
Love Seat Would Like To See More Information Before Committing To A Position

"Renault chair says company and Nissan share 'desire' for successful alliance" - Globe and Mail

Wasn't That A J. K. Rowling Novel?

"Meghan and the half-royal prince" - Toronto Sun

Laurie Anderson Won The Office Pool!

"Don't expect pay equity until 2183, report says" - Toronto Star

You Could Say That There Was No Love Lost Between Their Members

"Romance Writers of America faces a reckoning" - Globe and Mail

Are The Front Lines Far Enough?

"Canada must distance itself from U.S. military ventures" - Toronto Star

By Becoming One Of Them!

"If Trudeau cares about refugees, he should prove it" - Toronto Sun

They Do Agree That You Should Buy Their Products, Though, So There's That...

"Companies can't agree how to save planet" - Toronto Star

Stimpy Suspiciously Silent

"Huawei: Ren insists company follows international law" - Globe and Mail

Makes Sense: Robots Have Never Lied To Them

"Women nicer to robots than men: Poll" - Toronto Sun