Headlines, Man - They're Trippy, Hippie!

And, They Watched While He Begged Russia For Help, Blackmailed Ukraine For Help And Pardoned Unrepentant War Criminals, So If THEY Think He's Gone Too Far...

"Trump call has allies fearful for democracy" - Toronto Star

He Believes Money Grows On Tables Made From Trees

"Cop made 'honest mistake,' trial told
Lawyer says constable who took $360 at crime scene had no ill intent" - Toronto Star

Because The Red Zone Is So Inviting?

"In 2021, let's all step outside our comfort zone" - Globe and Mail

Acronymophobes Need TLC

"We urgently need bubbles for LTCs" - Toronto Star

 "28 LRT workers test positive for COVID-19" - Toronto Star

Commitment To Reform Seems 0% Earnest

"Police chief seeking 0% budget increase" - Toronto Star

Putting The Beverage Through A Proper Filtration Plant Would Be More Likely To Help Quench One's Thirst, But When You're Desperate You'll Try Anything

"First Nations pursue clean drinking water through the courts" - Globe and Mail

But, I Don't Own A Hazmat Suit!

"How to invest in disruptive technologies" - Toronto Star

The Year Was Bad Enough - Why Would Anybody In Their Right Mind Want To Preserve It?

"Minnesota park earns dark sky certification
Park just across border recognized for efforts to preserve darkness" - Toronto Star

 On New Year's, Staff Will Be Allowed To Drink Full Glasses
Should Help Them Forget The Virus Risk Much More Quickerly

"Firms respect staff by not mandating shots" - Toronto Star

Sounds Good, But Before I Do I'd Like To Know How Sean Penn Feels About The Idea

"Let's leave our obsession with celebrity culture back in 2020" - Globe and Mail

As If Queen's Park Isn't Raucous Enough

"Pick up the pace on jabs" - Toronto Star

And They Will...When All Canadians Invest In The Companies...

"Telecom giants should be serving all Canadians" - Toronto Star

That's How Dangerous It Is: It Can Kill You Twice!

"California funeral homes hit hard by virus" - Toronto Star

Hey! - If They're Rolly Poly, Put Them On My Plate!

"To Ease Hunger, Free Fish Heads" - New York Times

You Know The One - The Year That Dare Not Speak Its Name

"Parties muted as curtain draws on that year" - Toronto Star

If They Kept Their Assets In The Pipelines Where They Belonged, This Would Never Have Happened

"Exxon reports writedown of $20B on upstream assets" - Toronto Star

Apparently, You CAN Put A Price On Life

"Moderna shots expected to generate $11B this year" - Toronto Star

But...But...But, What's The Point Of Personal Growth If You Can't Share It With Your Friends On Social Media?

"JET-SETTING JETTISON
When leisure travel eventually resumes, it should no longer be considered a hobby, Rebecca Tucker writes. Trips abroad should be viewed as an extension of our values and a chance to foster personal growth, not a source of content for social-media feeds" - Globe and Mail

Are You Sure You're Asking The Right Question?

"Banning all single-use plastics is not the answer" - Toronto Star

One Of The Few Times A Bandaid Is The Best Solution

"Ontario sits on the precipice of cutting edge" - Toronto Star

What If The Audience Celebrates Judging?

"'This is going to be so damn hard'
Talent competition veteran says spinoff of 'The Masked Singer' is about celebration, not judging" - Toronto Star

Seniors May Have To Settle For Ill-fitting Dentures

"Banking code of conduct needs teeth, advocates say
Voluntary effort seen as good first step to protect seniors from financial harm" - Toronto Star

2021 Rolls Up Sleeves and Says, "Hold My Beer...It's Warm, Anyway..."

"2020 tied with 2016 as world's warmest year ever recorded, EU climate service warns" - Globe and Mail

 And, A Modem Is Not A Wombat
And, A Cellphone Is Not A Coffee Mug
What Have We Learned From All This?

"'A city is not a computer,' expert warns" - Toronto Star

Really? I'm Pretty Sure Bowie Never Played There...

"Key to life on Mars may be in Timmins" - Toronto Star

Wasn't That A Julie Roberts Movie?

"Infrared drones, search parties and a lasso: chasing a runaway llama" - Globe and Mail

I Am In Agreement With This Headline (Even If It Isn't In Agreement With Itself)

"Vaccines must go to those who need it most" - Toronto Star

 That Would Require Respect For Others
You Should Be Able To Understand Why I'm Not Hopeful...

"People urged to respect lockdown" - Toronto Star

 But, Everybody Knows Vaccines Cause Babies To Grow Three Heads!





It's Already Too Late, Isn't It?

"We must address anti-science sentiments before it's too late" - Toronto Star

Tired Of Winning? These Headlines Are Just What You Need!

"Solid win puts embarrassing loss in rear-view" - Toronto Star

 "Wolfpack handed sixth straight loss" - Toronto Star

 "Wiggins earns praise from new teammates
The Warriors have lost all six games since acquiring the forward from Vaughan, Ont., but there are reasons for cautious optimism" - Globe and Mail

 "Ovechkin buries goal No. 700 in loss to Devils" - Toronto Star

 "Auger-Aliassime loses another final" - Toronto Star