What makes a deplorable? Is it a willingness to say out loud the part that most sane people would only say in whispers in shadowy places while wearing dark glasses and playing music in the background to frustrate surveillance hardware? Partly. Mostly, though, it's the twinkle in the eye, the lilt in the voice, the smirk - especially the smirk - that screams, "This is batshit crazy! And if you believe it, you must be batshit crazy too! And there is enough batshit crazy out there for me to ride a wave of flying feces into public office!"
Exhbit A: look at the grin on the face of Michael Peroutka, the Republican Party's nominee for Maryland attorney general. You don't have to know anything else about him to know that the 2006 radio series on 9/11 that he hosted would be full of, "Let us imagine..."s and "It's not out of the realm of possibility..."s and "If that is true, then it's only logical to assume..."s (and devoid of facts). It makes you wonder who then President George W. Bush was talking about when he said, "They hate our freedoms."
Marvin Gaye's Estate Should Sue For Copyright Infringement...Or Tackiness With Intent
Another sign that a politician has taken up residence in the Basket of Deplorables is how insistent they are that the batshit crazy is not a funhouse mirror that reflects an oxygen-deprived society, but, in fact, a perfectly reasonable way of looking at the world. Why, hello, Republican candidate for Governor of Pennsylvania Doug Mastriano. What a coincidence - I was just talking about you!
Mastriano's application of the famous quote about fighting Nazi oppression to mask mandates would have Martin Niemöller spinning in his grave, if so many other Republicans hadn't appropriated it before him. Nothing says "I would like to speak to you, today, from my condo in the Basket of Deplorables," more than a good Godwin's Law violation.
You might think that somebody who organized buses for the January 6 Thrillah in Vanillah in Washington, illegally entered the Capitol building on that day, and campaigned at QAnon events might go a little easy on comparing people to fascists. You might also think that the best way to cut your hair is with a chainsaw. When they have to ingest irony the size of a 2001: A Space Odyssey monolith, people who live in the Basket of Deplorables just unhinge their jaws and get to it.
As for living in Realville? I'm looking at a map of the Basket of Deplorables...I can see a RealityTVville neighbourhood, a Really Wealthy so Don't Bug Us or We'll Have Our Private Security Force Deal With Youville neighbourhood and a Reality-free Zone, but - nope. No Realville. Are you surprised? Really? Have you met the Basket of Deplorables?
No Amount Of Window Dressing Can Make Some Word Salads Palatable!
Occasionally losing your train of thought can be a sign that you have too many things to say and can't get them out of your mouth fast enough. People who live in the Basket of Deplorables, by way of contrast, board the thought train and have their ticket punched, then ride off in all directions.
What is Herschel Walker, the former football star who is the Republican nominee for a Senate seat in Georgia, talking about? Uhh...bortion? Maybe? People who advocate for gun control? Perhaps. How to run a Reverse Cowgirl Shotgun Rumination pattern when behind by 30 points? You can't rule anything out as a possibility with him.
The sad thing about Walker is that you can see him trying to articulate Republican talking points on mass shootings (if that's actually what he's on about) but having the ball glance off the tips of his fingers in the end zone. At the buzzer. Of a tight game.
The saddest thing is he has a very good chance of winning his seat. Voters in the basket of Deplorables are legion, and they are quite happy wearing their underpants on their heads, thank you very much!
