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Chapter 18
June 27, 2010
Header Done
Spend It On Hookers, Booze and Cigarettes:Greece About To Tank World Economy
Time And Basic Incompatibility Will Take Care Of That
It Never Falls Too Far From The Decision Tree
What Always Happens When You Train Somebody To Be A Killer? He Went Freelance
THE MAKING OF A MYSTERY MAN"
About Time A Journalist Was Brave Enough To Tell The Bed Bug's Story!
Nothing New There - Now, If It Had Been A SHAM WOW Empire...
Eww! Maybe If...No, Still Eww!
Has Anybody Told Jim Flaherty This?
Can I Help It If Beer Upsets My Stoma - What? That's Not What You're Referring To?
Skjalfti is Icelandic for earthquake since the lager was born during an earthquake and unveiled as another hit"
Get Used To Unemployment Lines?
When even the pros get trashed, what's a poor investor to do?"
Unlike The US Pavilion, Which Will Feature A Recreation Of Guantanamo Bay And Video Of Predator Drone Strikes On Civilians
Pavilions of North Korea, Iran and other paraiah states welcomed by China to offer distorted view of life in those countries"
Somehow, I Don't Think The Services Include Oil, Lube And A 12 Point Inspection
We Take Our Cue From Ottawa
In the schoolyard or the subway, we need to stand up to a bully, not stand by"
WHY DID WE LEAVE IT TO THEM TO DO THE PREDICTING?!
Rig's owners recently predicted major impact in an offshore accident would be unlikely"
That Might Explain The Plans For Ghostbusters 4
Maybe This Is A More Happening Place Than People Think!
Always Go With The Shyster You Know
Internet con artists prey on the desperate"
Let's Face The Music...And Dunce!
'Top hat' dome to be deployed in bid to control gushing oil now threatening Louisiana shores"
It's Even Funnier In 48 Point Bold Type
If Only She'd Stop Phoning While We Were Having Sex!
Henstein Nayan
Nobody Wants To Talk To Him Face To Face
The Market is Menopausal?
In A Week Or Two, It'll Send Out Invitations To Its Housewarming
The Last Good Year For Financial Predictions? 1692
Because It Takes A Lot More Effort Than Petty Negligence, And Effort Should Always Be Rewarded
They Can't Ruin Economies With Their Current Business Model
I'm Not The One With The Dirty Mind!
Roly Poly? (Eat Them Up - Yum!)
Proving Once Again That Antler Hats Are A Bad Idea For Hunters
Good To Know Rational Man Is Still In Charge
Markets roiled by persistent worries that Europe's debt problems will hobble the economic recovery"
Welcome, Science Fiction Fans!
If you came to Les Pages aux Folles curious about my writing thanks to science fiction or fan fiction, welcome! You can find the complete text of Alternate Reality Ain't What It Used To Be and What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children's Toys in the Archive Section, as well as three new Alternate Reality News Stories every third week in the New Section. They are clearly marked [ARNS] for easy identification. And, please feel to browse through the other writing, cartoons and miscellaneous oddments - you never know what you might enjoy!
You may already be a winner? Well, actually...
It is with great pleasure that I can announce that I have taken first prize in the Swift Satire Writing Competition. This was for a poem called "Love Amid the Construction. The official announcement can be found here. Details of the contest, including, at some point soon, my winning entry, can be found here. What can I say?
WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT!
Do Not Adjust Your Eyes
The Weight of Information: Episode One: The Realities Leak is now available on YouTube! This pilot for a radio series is based on stories out of the two Alternate Reality News Service Books, Alternate Reality Ain't What It Used To Be and What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children's Toys (or, as one online used bookstore has it, What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children - don't ask). Click on this link to listen to Part One and this link to listen to Part Two. Interdimensional travel has never been so...multidimensional!
You May Already Be A Winner Redux
The Alternate Reality News Service, in conjunction with the Grasping for the Wind Web site, is running a contest! The readers who submit the best questions to either of the Alternate Reality News Service columns (which, regular readers will remember, are Ask Amritsar and Ask the Tech Answer Guy) will win free autographed copies of What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children's Toys (or, as one online discount bookseller has it listed, What Were Once Miracles Are Now Children - don't ask). Click on the link for the rules. Enter now, enter often!Ira Speaks!
Sal Monaco, the Oracle of Enlightenment who now does interviews at Think Twice Radio, conducted an interview with me at Polaris 24. Don't think twice: go to Sal Monaco's Think Twice Radio Web page and give it a listen!
The Alternate Reality News Service Grows Up
Have you ever wanted to know what goes on behind the scenes at the Alternate Reality News Service? Of course you didn't! But, now that the question has been raised, it sounds intriguing, no? Okay, probably not. Still, here's the thing: there is now a Facebook group called The Alternate Reality News Service Cafe. If you go there, you will automatically receive a tri-weekly newsletter full of exclusive information. It is also a place where you can contribute to the Alternate Reality News Service and even, perhaps, work your way up the ARNS ladder until you are given a journalistic beat all for yourself. Doesn't that sound exciting?
Don't answer that.
Would you be interested in immortality?
As you may have noticed, there is a weekly feature on Les Pages aux Folles called The Daily Me. Each article in this feature is a collection of bits and pieces of interest to a different person. I probably won't be shocking any of my readers when I say that, to date, I have made the persons up. (If you are shocked, I hear the Girls With Eyepatches site is nice this time of year...) Well, a future Daily Me could feature...you!
Simply send me an email with your name and the names of three or four publications you regularly read and three or four issues/subjects in which you have an interest. Then, let me digest them and, two or three weeks later, The Daily Me could be The Daily You! Your name will appear in my writing...forever! No complicated creams! No messy cryogenic devices! Immortality has never been easier! What are you waiting for?